Please if you read my blog,leave a comment. Tell me what you think

Hi to all of you who read about my life. You don't know the true story about me. I have been thru hell.
I am getting married on Oct 31/2014. But once again, no family, no white wedding dress, no reception. I am very depress. I guess I am lucky the anyone would want to marry me from my back round.
I really thought that the GKs would have a reality show by then. I thought maybe the show could pay for our wedding and make it better then this. I really did think that the GKs would be a reality show and people would start coming out to see us and give us donations. Karma is against  me. I make plans and dreams,no one comes or supports me. But U can bet your last dollar I will do it for them. I do it because I care. Even thought they will not talk to don and myself and just stay away from us. I wish I knew why people hate us.
I wish I could win like 50 million and just go and build my dream log home and live away from people and adopt teenaged for a family and teach them how to get along with people and survive. Never happen.

Getting Married

After 13 years,my fiancé Donny and myself are finally getting married. On Halloween of all day. Well heck it's our favorite holiday.
I really do hope a few of my GKs brothers and Sisters show up. I think they won't. Its last minute and people have parties to go to and have to work. If I only had money. I have a real wedding with a white dress and all the trimming.

I kew back in 3rd grade making plans in my head was foolish. Nothing turn out as I dreamed it could be.

Nothing New...YET

Well,its a rainy wednesday here in amish land. Yuck!I finish cleaning the house and now I am doing laundry. I wish people who read my Blog would leave me a comment. I like to know what you think, My life sucks.....BIG TIME. I am in a place I never thought I would be here in pa. I have no job,I am on disability. I'm trying to get a reality show for the club to build a club house and get some major people to notice that bikers are good people.

Now on top of this negative stuff. I have Uterine Cancer. I say to myself. Yep,why not. My life has been fucked up all the way,why not have cancer to piss me. As if other things in my life aren't doing just that.
I still haven't bonded w/ any of the women in the club. I guess for them I am too wild,or too fat and ugly for them. I really do try to be friendly.

http://youtu.be/r1W-WjPyfOU

My 2 day of posting my Cancer

What's going on today. I have a great many people who wrote very positive message on my Facebook in the last 2 day. My question,only 4 people phoned me privately. What about the rest? I get longly at about 6pm till don comes home. Even then I am alone. He comes home eats,plays w/ the Dog and 2 cats/retreats into the man cave.
I will fight this illness alone.

 Whats more, is that I am deeply deeply hurt by my bros/sister from the motorcycle club I am in. I really thought they were behind in my quest for a reality show. It was of course making money for the club. Almost trying to send a message that a large part of money come from bikers who ride for Charities.
I told everyone it would take 1-2 years. So it was 3 yrs. Now nothing. It's like my mom used to say,"Don't count on it Crystal." People say 1 thing and mean something else.

Oct 20 2014

Well I found last week that I has Uterine Cancer. That blew my mind all the hell. It seems that if you still have your periods at age 54,you may have this type of Cancer. Now I have to see a dr. on how he/she is going to treat it.